December 20, 2010

my goodness. how is it that i have left this wonderful space all by itself for so long, i hear you asking.

well.

there was the novel. (and yes, i did get to 50,000 words, though i still have not finished the beast itself. almost! final scenes left to write!)

and then there was pre-christmas mania, being headhunted for a new job, saying yes to new job, crazy shit going down at my old job in a not great way, wedding planning, so much wedding planning, buying things for christmas, buying things for the wedding, many many obligatory social functions, arguments, tears, emotional cold wars (not with the fianc, let me add), setting of boundaries and keeping them despite the previous two points, oh and did i mention christmas?

in all of this, one of the things that makes me saddest is the fact that we still have not found the time to put up our christmas tree. every time we're at home and have time we wind up lying on the couch in a state of semi-comatose exhaustion. i may or may not have gotten all teary about this on the weekend. in response, the fianc strode out of the room. (i kept lying on the couch.) a few minutes later he came back and stuck a piece of paper on the wall with some blu-tack.

it had a christmas tree carefully drawn on it in blue pen, and underneath it said (just in case it wasn't clear):

TREE


he really is the sweetest. now i almost don't want to put up our 'real' tree, because i kind of love his thoughtfulness of the makeshift paper tree. and the point of it, as well - if the true spirit of christmas is giving and generosity and loving people, there is nothing wrong with loving yourself a little and giving yourself a break to rest. this can be SUCH a crazy time of year. this year, i am just trying not to push myself too hard. and i'm quite openly looking forward to boxing day - on which i plan to do absolutely nothing.

November 3, 2010

posting might be light in november as i try to kick my ass into gear and write the terrible novel that's been wandering around in my head.

right now, the fianc is interstate "on business". he often is, but i've learned to mostly like these funny solo gal nights. right now it's brandy, watching bones and hopefully soon bed with purry cats.

(fianc away would be much harder without the two furry people. cat people, that is. they're very good at insisting on lots of attention and licking my nose.)

October 29, 2010

tgiff.

today i spent the entire day fighting off a screen headache. standard strength neurofen made it sort of go away for a while, but by 4pm it was back with a vengeance. by 5.30 when i left work i was nauseous and dizzy. (good thing my job involves staring at a screen all day, hey.)

here is my solution for the borderline migraine i just made go away:

super strong neurofen plus forte genius extreme. x 2.

lie down in a dark room with an eye mask on for extra darkness. allow no sounds.

(for bonus points do this naked between flannel sheets. they are very comforting.)

when the throbbing and buzzing has completely ceased, and you can take the eye mask off without the light hurting your brain again, get up. SLOWLY.

the nausea will still be present. fix this with four or more pieces of sourdough bread, intermixed with bites of tasty cheese. eat slowly and appreciate the comfort food. (if this is not your comfort food, substitute appropriate alternatives. however, i highly recommend carbs.)

wash down with beer. (if it interacts with the insaneo strong painkillers, all the better. maybe don't drive anywhere though.)

now you may look at your computer screen again. carefully. if any signs of repeat headache even suggest themselves to you, flee the area.

October 18, 2010

p.s.

i didn't think it was possible for me to be excited about a wedding dress any more. i've done so much research that white blindness has become second nature to me. (and that i know what the phrase "white blindness" refers to. here's a hint: not skiing.) i've done so much research that there were points in time where even the words "wedding" and "dress" in the one sentence were enough to make me simultaneously slightly nauseous, and FURIOUS for no apparent reason. i was pretty sure that i had done SO much research that i had seen every wedding dress known to man and i hated all of them without exception, because the research had made me physically ill. i had been to salons, i had been to normal dress shops, i had been to indie dress shops, i had been to op shops (thrift stores), and of course i had scoured the internet with a fine tooth comb.

and after all that, i was semi-seriously considering a bikini wedding (and yes, that would be a bikini wedding elopement, for surely obvious reasons) because by that point i hated all the wedding dresses so much i would happily have set them on fire.

but. BUT. here's the kicker.

i found myself sitting in my office this morning trying not to squeal out loud about the colour of chiffon petticoats. and not in an ironic way. in an actual, OMGperfectcolourOMG, i am twelve years old, squeal-y way. because i think i am actually going to like my dress.

(and also because i have lost my mind, clearly. i said to my friend, "i am excited about chiffon. aliens have abducted my brain". he replied, "well, yes. but at least it isn't permanent.")

discussing very final dress decision

me: both [dress options] would be beautiful
friend: that is a tough decision! and both so close together!
me: yes!
at the same time, i would love them both
i think one is a bit more classic
(the lace one)
but actually, the tulle would make me look more "bridal" than the lace, maybe
friend: yeah they both have elements of that classic bridal look
gosh
i am always inclined towards the more fun option
you should print out life size versions of both
me: HAHAHA
life size cutouts! OF MYSELF!
rofl
this is clearly the most appropriate bridal thing to do.
friend: yes
that would not look at all crazy
use the large plan printer at work since the office is empty
me: hahahaha
and then propping them up in my office
and covering them with PRO or CON postit notes.
friend: 'i don't like this cuff'
'this strap could be 3mm wider'
do itttttt


(no, i have not done this. yet.)

October 12, 2010

things that inevitably bring improvement to an otherwise fairly shitty day:

feta cheese and crackers
dry white wine (not too cold, must be able to actually taste said wine)
cuddles and superb listening skills from the fianc
cats demanding attention and chasing crumpled paper balls all over the house
trackpants and slippers
magnetic fields
georgette heyer novels awaiting me
marinated salmon and salad for dinner (to offset all the cheese)
fianc. again. because he is just really extra-specially great when i've had a crappy day.

October 4, 2010

bring on summer

this weekend was a really fantastic, tumultuous, complicated, relief of a weekend. i felt like i hadn't had a weekend in MONTHS. not a proper one.

i realise now that a lot of this is that the sun finally came out. properly. not in that wimpy, hey it's going to rain again soon and go back to being 15 degrees, way that it has occasionally throughout winter. it was actually warm for the first time in ... since what, May? i turned pink from sitting outside at lunchtime on sunday! i cannot underestimate just how much good some sunshine will do. (not the burny cancerous part, the vitamin d part.) i felt alive again. makes me want to move to the gold coast and sunbake through winter every year.

also, and in no particular order:

i found a wedding dress that makes my heart sing
i had breakfast and lunch (in the one day!) with a lady who is making me happy with a new kind of friendship
i had time to lie around with the fianc and not feel exhausted
i had a big, good, much needed cry. or two.
i did things just for myself
i talked to my mum properly for the first time in months. (missed her a lot.)
i ate one of my favourite summer foods, and it was delish
i started to actually feel really 'me' about the wedding - like it's for us, not somebody else

and tonight i got home from work, and the sun was still shining, and it was warm, and i went for my favourite run with lady gaga pumping in my ears and the wind from the sea through my hair.

things are looking up!

September 29, 2010

song of the moment

I get up in the evening
And I ain't got nothing to say

I come home in the morning

I go to bed feeling the same way

I ain't nothing but tired

Man I'm just tired and bored with myself

Hey there baby, I could use just a little help


You can't start a fire

You can't start a fire without a spark

This gun's for hire

Even if we're just dancing in the dark


Message keeps getting clearer

Radio's on and I'm moving 'round the place

I check my look in the mirror

I wanna change my clothes, my hair, my face

Man I ain't getting nowhere

I'm just living in a dump like this

There's something happening somewhere

Baby I just know that there is


You can't start a fire

You can't start a fire without a spark

This gun's for hire

Even if we're just dancing in the dark


You sit around getting older

There's a joke here somewhere and it's on me

I'll shake this world off my shoulders

Come on baby this laugh's on me


Stay on the streets of this town

And they'll be carving you up alright

They say you gotta stay hungry

Hey baby I'm just about starving tonight

I'm dying for some action

I'm sick of sitting 'round here trying to write this book

I need a love reaction

Come on now baby gimme just one look


You can't start a fire sitting 'round crying over a broken heart

This gun's for hire

Even if we're just dancing in the dark

You can't start a fire worrying about your little world falling apart

This gun's for hire

Even if we're just dancing in the dark



...Even if we're just dancing in the dark...




September 26, 2010

these are a few of my favourite things

meeting up with old friends and unexpected gifts and telling the truth and twilit bike rides home and living by the beach and being yourself and knowing it's going to be ok and at the end of the day you get to go home to two cats that want to lick your nose and sparkley headbands and putting your feet up and daydreams and high heels and knowing that summer is coming, soon

September 20, 2010

recipes

for delicious berry cakes

250g butter
2 cups plain flour
2/12 teaspoons baking powder
1 cup sugar
3 eggs
a dash of vanilla essence
lots of berries. ok, berries to taste. or just berries to fill the bottom of 12 muffin cups. frozen is absolutely fine, probably preferable, even.

do this:
  1. turn on your oven to about 165 centigrade.
  2. thoroughly grease a tray of 12 muffin tins, and put a layer of berries (any kind) in the bottom. put aside for a moment.
  3. cream butter and sugar. (not by hand. it is not 1950 and we have discovered the electric beater.) add eggs and vanilla essence (approx 1 tsp) and beat thoroughly. sift flour and baking powder on top, mix thoroughly. it should be a very stiff mixture at this point.
  4. dump about a tablespoon and a half of the cake mix in each cup, making sure you cover all the berries (if not they will boil up the sides and make the cake hard to get out of the tin).
  5. put the tray in the oven for 20 mins or until they've risen and are golden brown on top. take out and wait for a bit before running a knife around the edge and putting them on a cooling rack upside down (or berry side up). if the berries stick to the bottom of the tin, use a teaspoon to get them out and put them back where they belong.
  6. try not to devour them all in the next hour or so.

for vegetarian burritos

1 brown onion
1 tin red kidney beans
1 tin chopped tomatoes
jar salsa
burrito spices in a packet
burritos
lettuce, tomato, sour cream, tasty cheese, whatever else you like (for compilation)

do this:

  1. brown the onion on quite a high heat.
  2. add drained and rinsed kidney beans, and burrito spices. stir about.
  3. add tinned tomatoes, more stirring, add more burrito spices.
  4. add half a jar of salsa to taste. mess with consistency until deliciously thick and goopy.
  5. assemble burritos!
  6. devour. in the next hour or so, preferably immediately. serve leftovers for breakfast, or any time really.

for a lovely evening

2 cats
1 fianc
lots of food (see above)
no tasks awaiting completion
beer
internet
good book
warm comfy bed

do this:

  1. eat above cakes and burritos, possibly to excess.
  2. wash down with redback beer.
  3. let your cat sit on you and lick your nose.
  4. hug a fianc.
  5. watch old mtv videos with bruce springsteen and courtney cox (as fianc commented, before she dieted herself to extreme stick-ness).
  6. revel in a clean kitchen after all that cooking.
  7. relax into the warm bed and good book that await you.

September 16, 2010

one of these days, my scrolly wheel finger is going to develop RSI. and then i won't be able to scroll through thousands of pages of legislation any more. well, crap.

no, really i should not be doing pathetic whinging. for starters, it's friday afternoon! for me, this means endeavouring to locate and consume lots of beer in the immediate future, hopefully (HOPEFULLY) late night pizza and more beer, and then a rather incredible amount of sleep.

what can i say? i set the bar high.

September 14, 2010

ooof

this pescatarian thing is good in theory and supposed to be helping me lose weight. (note: i'm not all girly about this shit, i just like being relatively slim and have a dangerous predeliction for cheese and beer that i need to keep an eye on.) but for lunch today my brain was all "prawn and cherry tomato pizza!" and i said "ok, brain! awesome!" and then added a tim tam, and now i feel like i ate a dinosaur or some other large object. a brick, maybe. whoops.

in addition i'm heading off to my alma mater and leaving work early today to talk about the process by which i got my day job and how it (the process) is awesome. or at least, i suspect that's what they're hoping i'll say to all the young niblets i'll be showing around. more likely i will warn them that they are most likely about to lose their souls in exchange for knowing how to look up arcane case law and cram like they've never crammed before in their lives. for me it was worth it (sort of), but i still wonder whether it really is for most people. i wanted to be a lawyer from age ten onwards and the only thing that convinced me i didn't really want to go to law school was, well, going to law school. touche, world, touche. and here i am, working in my current job at [redacted], and it's ... well it would be good if i could change a few rather key elements. like one or two of the people. and the shape of the building. and the dress code. (so very much wish i could wear jeans to work.) and no, i haven't heard back from the dream job people yet, but they told me i wouldn't for a while. so. shrug. ok. still waiting, very nice people!

i better get back to the grindstone, tapping away in front of a screen and thinking about how stupid people are. (no really, that's a fair description of my work. in fact that's probably all i can tell you! there you go.)

September 13, 2010

gosh i'm in a bad mood. no, really. my scowling would frighten you from a distance.

luckily i have the prospect of this to cheer me up. and this! and also, in the more immediate future, the prospect of hitting up shanghai village tomorrow night with my boys for many many vegetarian dumplings and beers.

still cranky though. grr.

September 12, 2010

moving day

today we spontaneously went to help a friend of fianc's who was moving house a couple of blocks. no big drama, we thought - we were only asked casually to join a team of helpers, we thought it'd be some lifting boxes and probably a couple of beers at the end.

we could not have been MORE WRONG.

some things that happened in the process:
- we destroyed the first wardrobe halfway down the stairs of the house we were moving it out of. we picked it up and it dramatically fell apart. (bought less than 6 months ago. ah, ikea.)
- we were transporting a huge couch on a trailer on the back of the car. we thought we had secured it fairly well. we hadn't. it fell off in the middle of church st (busy street!) and only narrowly avoided a taxi. we had to leave it by the side of the road for about half an hour while we did the rest of the transportation for that trip. (yes, it was still there when we got back.)
- we destroyed the second wardrobe picking it up off the trailer - we managed to get it down the (same as above) stairs and onto the trailer, but when we tried to get it off the trailer again? spontaneous combustion. (yes, it WAS the same make as the first wardrobe! NICE ONE, IKEA.)
- fianc got thoroughly dinged up in the leg from the first wardrobe falling on top of him as it fell apart. he has been in the wars lately, not good! poor leg.

by the time we had made a big pile of all the pieces of wardrobe for hard rubbish pick up, the whole thing seemed utterly insane. did i mention it was just the three of us for most of this time? nobody else was there to help! even the other housemates who were moving were noticeably absent. (about which i raised an extremely unimpressed eyebrow. multiple times.) i was glad we were there though, because if we hadn't spontaneously decided to turn up, i cannot imagine how friend of ours would've moved. it would have actually been physically impossible.

on the up side, like the gentleman he is, friend bought us both dinner and beers after at the local :D excellent. we watched the US Open women's final and drank our beers and chatted about miscellany.

i was really glad we'd gone. despite the wardrobes. and the couch.

September 10, 2010

weekend roundup

good things:

wedding dresses that come in parcels in the mail. it's like christmas for grownups, shopping on ebay, especially in the era of credit cards. i tried on the dress and twirled around and figured out the alterations and got all excited. i showed fianc (we are not of the superstitious or the lame. he has excellent dress sense.) and he said he thought i looked hot. WIN.

camembert and french baguette.

second hand market bookstores. or just, you know, any second hand book stores anywhere.

cats that want to sleep all curled up next to you and stop you from going to sleep with their purring.

champagne and tapas on a friday night with excellent conversation. best night out i've had in a while. delightful, and when you eat barely anything, surprisingly inexpensive!

bad things:

the new neighbours above us decided to have a party on friday night. i got home at 11.30, champagne-fuelled, and fell asleep. until 2.30. then 3.30. then 4.30. at about 5.25 they turned off the brain-numbing thumping bass music JUST before i was about to go upstairs in my pajamas and physically kill them / scream obscenities / ok probably give them a cutting speech about how they were new in the building and now everyone hated them, nice one new kids. thank god they have stopped the music now, i thought. a minute later they started singing along at the top of their lungs to music from Glee. my death instinct warred with my instinct to laugh hysterically; the latter won. just.

more good things:

saturday afternoon naps. i must go do this now. later we will return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

September 9, 2010

this is the sound of my triumphant laughter

i hereby dub operation "experiment: buy wedding dress on ebay" a resounding success

September 8, 2010

i called the blog 'misc etc' for a reason

i am sorting socks. having bought 12 pairs of socks last week because all my socks are now in the wash, i now have a ridiculous number of pairs of socks. they are, however, all quite different. i'm not sure how i managed this. how many colours and patterns of sock can there realistically be? (this is the point in time that fianc would say something like, "ALL SOCKS should be BLACK". imaginary him has a point.)

myself and the lovely fianc [fie-an-ssss] are going to meet a marriage celebrant tonight. this is... weird. i'm sure we'll be asked to talk about ourselves a lot. what's to say? we've been together for four and a bit years and we both really like our cats. i make him brownies on demand. we make each other laugh hysterically about complete rubbish all the time. it's very good. he also smells better than anyone else, and is incredibly patient (the latter being a prerequisite of being friends with or generally knowing me without attempting to kill me, i think.) anyway - i hope the whole thing doesn't wind up being like a personality job interview.

speaking of which i have a real job interview tomorrow, with an organisation i've wanted to work with for a long, long time. even before i lost my mind and went to law school. (synchronicitous events. i think.) we'll see how it goes. i am ill-prepared. by which i mean i have made some phone calls to people in the know, and planned my outfit, and that's about it. relying on my undying love of improv and toothy smile. killer.

now it is time to get back to my buffy reruns and smile about the delightful postcard i got in the mail today addressed to "The Future Mr and Mrs [fianc] [fianc's last name]". first time anyone's called me that! the feminista in me is disappointed that the rest of me was thrilled, but i was anyway. also the front of the postcard was hilarious, but it was a visual joke i cannot possibly explain herein, so you'll just have to imagine a hilarious thing, for now.

September 7, 2010

gchat #1

me:
ran into a girl from school this morning and tried to be nice to her, only to hear she got a job i wanted. damn school people! always getting the good jobs!
hilariously, all the people who really pissed me off at school are now lawyers.
i cannot win!
if they turn up at [new job i want, obvs redacted], i will ... do something drastic
like, be really really nice so they can't be annoying and hate me any more. HA! SUCK IT, MEAN GIRLS!
...gosh i'm mature.